2023: Reflections and the year ahead

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves. 

Wild Geese, Mary Oliver

It’s 7am on Boxing Day. I can hear birds chattering furiously outside my window. The washing machine is on its spin cycle downstairs and the eldest of my small children has just bounded down the steps without my customary hug and hello, eager to play on the new computer game he received yesterday. 

I’m reflecting on 2023.

After a 21 year relationship and several years of separation, 2023 started off with notice of both my divorce papers coming through and of winning the inaugural Ross Todd award for Outstanding Research Project based on my teaching of information literacy using coaching skills. That, combined with school turmoil for my eldest and asthma-attack related visits to the hospital for my youngest, left me in a somewhat mixed emotional state.

Self-compassion and connection were my guiding words for 2023. For the last few years, I have chosen a word to guide me. Previously, they have included words such as energy, love, fun, and dignity. Last year I chose the two. Reader, to loosely quote Brené Brown - I did the best I could with the tools I had.

I struggled (and still struggle) with both of those concepts. I am independent, self-sufficient-ish and, because I spend so much time helping and advising others as part of my job role, I can become ‘peopled out’ and forget to connect with others more generally. I can also be quite hard on myself. Checking in with those words throughout the year reminded me to be kinder to myself, and to send emails asking people to meet. I even tried a friends meet-up app (with dubious results but I haven't given up yet - I don't know how people cope with dating apps!). 

I gained new tools by going to therapy. This helped to some extent but what helped more was talking to colleagues whom I also consider friends. They’ve lifted me up over this last year and for that I am truly grateful. Inspired by journalist, Poorna Bell, and a colleague, I also took myself out intentionally when I had the opportunity. It was an odd experience but one I am keen to do more of.

My general aims and plans for 2023 were:

• to have lots of fun with my two little ones - this I did. We went to the woods, to the beach, to nature trails, museum trails, theatre, cinema, Go Ape, I learned to play Mario Kart - badly. I also joined the gym as it has kids and family clubs which has been enjoyable, and given me much needed headspace

Magical creatures in the woods

Playing by the sea

• focus on my PhD - this I did. I passed my review with 30,000 words written and lots of positive comments as well as helpful advice. I had a day out at the British Library which I enjoyed
• blend my professional interests - this I have been working on. I was accepted to present at three conferences. Two I could do as they were online and one I had to withdraw, due to childcare reasons. My presentations focussed on coaching and compassion in higher education. As a result of these talks I was invited to lead a LTHE Twitter/X chat on compassion in universities and I am increasingly being asked to deliver teaching sessions related to coaching, mentoring, compassion and mindfulness. I remain a primary school wellbeing governor and have recently participated in conversations on academic identities, uplifting those of working class origins, and compassion in higher education so I look forward to seeing where they go.

For 2024? 

I won’t be bounding into the new year. I’m giving myself permission to step slowly, purposefully and with intention. There are no grand ambitions. I’ll be supporting my children with what has been a rough few years for them. I’ll be walking in woods, by rivers and visiting the sea. I’ll be clearing weeds and smelling roses. I will not be applying to present anywhere this year and will instead be focussing on writing. 

With regards my PhD, I am already revisiting old favourites in the form of Freire, Fromm and hooks for my research philosophy. They write of the different types of love, of being rather than having, and remind me that love is a verb. Love and compassion are needed at all levels of the education sector. Dr Jenny Lawrence writes eloquently on this topic

The message from my tea was clear!

And so I am choosing love again for my word. Not in the romantic sense, but in how it shows up in the actions we take - in friendships, in work, in our environment, in family and in self-care. I’ve spent the last few years trying to figure things out and I’ve been called ‘a superwoman’ numerous times for the amount of plates I’m spinning. While this is given as a complement, I don’t want the title. It’s exhausting and full of pressure. Instead, as Mary Oliver suggests, I am going to let the ‘soft animal of my body, love what it loves’. 

What about you? Do you have goals or themes for 2024? Are you proud of how 2023 turned out or relieved and grateful you are still here to tell your story? What are you giving yourself permission to do?

One year into the PhD - the journey so far

 A year ago, almost to the day, I started my part-time PhD. I can’t believe that time has disappeared already and that is more than a little scary.

I’m writing this post firstly to help me keep track of where I am, secondly to be able to look back on this one day when I have my doctoral robes (sadly no sword for us in the UK – very envious of Finland!), and thirdly, because I would have liked to have read a post from someone in a similar position and I haven’t found much. Hopefully this will help someone in the future. For context, I work full-time, am a single mum to two little ones, am a primary school governor, and due to a variety of reasons I don’t get much in the way of practical support.

Doing a PhD had been on my radar for about eight years, although I hadn’t pinpointed an actual topic or idea how I could actually fit it in. In 2021, I recognised that I couldn’t wait anymore, that there was never going to be a perfect time, and that I needed to move forward with my life -  so I started the conversations and started putting together a research proposal. In early 2022, I was interviewed for the place and was accepted. And it’s been quite the year since.

Due to working mainly with people either with or on their way to obtaining their PhDs, I was under no illusion of the stress and challenges – my Twitter feed is full of it. However, my plan of working everyday 8-10pm did not work as I would regularly fall asleep and my brain was in no place to think. I hadn’t banked on that as I have managed to lead programmes (including the department during the first year of Covid lockdowns); complete a 500-hour yoga teacher training course; deliver national and international conference sessions; and write – all while on little sleep and a slightly fuzzy head. It turns out I can’t do a PhD like that.

More recently, I have managed to find some ways of working that suited me, found some helpful podcasts/Youtube videos and been introduced to some supportive online communities. I did go through a sticky patch at the latter end of last year due to some significant school challenges and some complications in the divorce process, which corresponded with seemingly never-ending children’s sickness bugs – to the extent that abeyance was mentioned.

Since then radical acceptance, prioritisation and organisation has been key.

Snowdrops: they seem delicate but can withstand challenging environments - I'm sure there's a metaphor in there somewhere :)

What has been challenging?

Finding thinking and writing time: This is the most crucial for me. I now get up quite early in the morning and after the cat is fed and I have done some gentle yoga, I spend time on the PhD. Previously I had let it go weeks as I felt I needed large chunks of time. While that would be lovely, I need to work with what I have. I aim to touch the PhD every day and usually write 200/250 words a day. It’s not much but it all adds up.

Balancing all the things: Most self-help gurus will say focus on one thing and do it well. However, when you have responsibilities and mouths to feed this isn’t always practical. My yoga teaching and coaching are on hold; however, I do the occasional voluntary session at work to keep my skills fresh and I incorporate the principles of both into my teaching. I could potentially give up the governor position; however, after seeking advice from someone I respect, I have now clarified my role. As a result, I have added value (the school now have three core values rather than substantially more) and I appreciate the friendship and support they have provided.

Isolation: My work is very people-focussed and facing so I don’t feel like I am missing out in terms of contact with others. If anything, I can find it tiring. Although rather disturbingly, during the lockdowns, I realised that quarantine had become my usual lifestyle. However, there’s something to be said for being with people who understand and truly see you and this is why the word ‘connection’ has become a bit of a theme this year.

What has made life easier?

 My supervisors: They are amazing, lovely and kind. They know I can be hard on myself so they are clear and gentle with their criticism. I need them to not sugarcoat but also not be brutal and they do this well.

Changing my environment: I work on my day job between campus and home and when at home I migrate between the table, a desk in my bedroom or the settee.  At the moment, every two to three months, I do get a day or two to myself in which I study and I find working elsewhere useful. So far, I have used postgraduate research rooms, the public  library and have ventured to the British Library. If I combine it with a parkrun or some yoga, it can feel like a retreat. (I was recently going to apply for a single mum’s writing retreat but after they received approx. 700 applications I decided not to – there’s clearly a need for it!)

Friendship: Several individuals have cheered me on and made me both laugh and reflect through the last year.  They are all wonderful human beings and I appreciate every one of them.

Going forwards, I really need to crack on with my literature review but, in the meantime,  I am sat next to my youngest who has spent the last few days vomiting. As I said, radical acceptance is key!

I’d love to hear your experiences. Feel free to share them in the comments.

2022: Reflections and the year ahead

 

"The stars began to burn

Through the sheets of clouds

And there was a new voice

Which you slowly recognised as your own"

                                                            The Journey, Mary Oliver

Another year and another Mary Oliver quotation from me. This one is from The Journey and I think it is my favourite.

I have been wondering on and off whether to share an end of year post this time round. It has been a significant year for transitions and tribulations and they are far from over. 

Like the previous year, 2022 didn't get off to a great start. The kids and I had Covid at the same time as I had some of my big online teaching sessions. Hospital trips followed as it affected my youngest’s asthma. On reflection, I should have postponed my teaching but at the time the thought of rearranging everything felt worse than pushing through.

Fortunately; dear reader, it started to pick up...

One of my intentions last year was to have lots of fun trips and adventures with my little ones. We definitely achieved this in 2022. We  went to adventure parks, a local festival, Go Ape challenges (I still haven’t mastered the best way to go down a zip wire!), a circus, the Legoland hotel for my son’s birthday (expensive but amazing), National Trust places, lots of parks and woods, plus we went to Centerparcs for the first time for my big birthday. I also drove (5 hours!) to see my parents in Morecambe. While I can’t afford to repeat this in quite the same way next year, I want to continue getting out and about to share joyful experiences with them.

Getting outdoors

Lego room

I had my research proposal accepted in April which was both exciting and scary. I am enjoying the process enormously and learning so much but, as expected when I signed up, progress is slow. This is something I need to get used to given the other demands on my time and energy.

Workwise, I took a step back from speaking at conferences and events to focus on the newly accredited programmes and pathways to Advance HE status as well as my PhD. Other than Springboard, which I’ve done for a few years now, I chose not to speak at anything in 2022. I was happy to put this aside as I had spoken at many events in the previous few years. I now intend to start this up again going forwards and will present again but only on areas directly related to my work or my research.

In May, I received my 500-hour Yoga Alliance International certificate which felt like a great achievement after everything that’s happened over the last few years. Since then I’ve been teaching yoga nidra at work and incorporating the philosophy and asana into my teaching. I also had a coaching article published this year too which I enjoyed writing. I’m looking forward to finding out how I can start to blend my coaching work with yoga, reflection and academic professional development.

I still write for The Academic Woman and I continue to be a wellbeing primary school governor. I find these positions rewarding and will remain in them so long as I can add value. 

Aims and plans for 2023:

For 2022, I chose the word dignity as my word of the year. It was a useful check-in throughout the months, and it can be easy to lose when there are challenging situations. I may have been spotted a tad tearful in the vicinity more than once but, in general, it was a good anchor.

This year I have chosen two – self-compassion and connection. The first is because too many people have recently told me I need to be kind to myself. I am listening! The second is because I spent some of 2022 re-establishing connections with people and it has been really lovely. This is something I want to increase and maintain.

My general aims and plans for 2023 then are:

• to have lots of fun with my two little ones
• focus on my PhD
• blend my professional interests
• consider the steps I need to take to get to Reader. (At one point, I wouldn’t have considered this but several people recently have told me they would support me if I did - so, I can but have a look)

Last year, I wrote I would go gently into the new year armed with compassion and friendship. As there are more changes (both positive and negative) on the horizon at work, some significant schooling challenges coming my way, and a literature review to write, this approach is more necessary than ever. 

I am hopeful. And when I am not, I will reread The Journey.  

I would love to know what your plans, goals and hopes are for 2023.

 

2021: Reflections and the year ahead

                                   "Tell me, what is it you plan to do, with your one wild and precious life" 

                                                            The Summer Day, Mary Oliver

I love Mary Oliver's poetry. I only have one book of hers, Devotions, but it always has a poem for every occasion and mood. This quote resonates right now for me as I think about my next steps, especially as I meet a big birthday next year. 

It's been difficult to blog this year, just as it was in 2020.

2021 didn't get off to a good start as the inevitable January lockdown in England was announced. We all knew it was coming but as the school closures were announced I, like many others, did cry as I wondered how I would manage. At times it didn't feel like it was going to get better, especially as it finally became official that my 21 year relationship had disintegrated too.

It would be remiss of me; however,  not to reflect on this year as I spend so much of my working life extolling the virtues of reflection!

Positives and challenges

Professional:

I followed up my previous presentations for Advance HE on coaching and academic practice by speaking at their HE Wellbeing Symposium about embedding coaching techniques into our accredited professional development programme. The focus was on time and space, something I feel that has been reduced for many over the years, and especially during the pandemic.

I continued my regular contributions to The Academic Woman magazine and was delighted to be invited to deliver a webinar for them and later to be invited to their editorial panel. I like working with this group  - our values align and they are filling a real gap in the market.

The Advance HE pathways I lead have gone from strength to strength which has been a relief, with the introduction of online writing retreats and a coaching programme. The thing I was most proud of; however, was being invited to the Special Libraries Association Europe and International Conferences. In the European one I was asked to speak about resilience and thriving. It was quite personal and the feedback was lovely - I really hope it helped people consider what they can control in the times we are living in. As you know from my social media, I am a bell hooks and Brene Brown fan. They both speak about showing vulnerability to encourage authenticity and courage, yet Brene warns about sharing issues you are still working through so it was a careful balance as to what to include.

Personal

I am still volunteering as a primary school governor, and still working on my 300 hour yoga teacher training certificate. The former has allowed me to learn and hopefully contribute to the school and the latter has been for my own personal interests - I have really enjoyed it, especially the yin yoga and yoga nidra elements of it. 

As lockdown eased,  I was able to continue the woodland and river walks, and arrange some trips with my children, including a lovely trip with fantastic views in Poole. 

In addition, I have completed my research proposal and have submitted it so hopefully I will be able to start a PhD this year.

Birthday walk by the river at Cliveden

Poole views

Aims and plans for 2022:

For 2021, I chose the word Energy as my word of the year. It was a useful check-in throughout the months but it's time for another one. I'm still deciding but in the meantime, my aims and plans for next year are:

• to have lots of fun with my two little ones.
• enjoy my 'big' birthday
• complete my 300hr YTT course which will then qualify me as a 500 hour YTT
• like last year, still plan amazing ' one-day' future adventures (I want to see waterfalls, cherry blossom and still dreaming of seeing the northern lights)
• start work on my PhD - eep!

I appreciate it is going to take a while for me to find self-acceptance and self-esteem again so I aim to go slowly and gently into the new year armed with compassion and friendship. 

I would love to know what your plans, goals and hopes are for 2022. Please feel free to use the comments.

Self-transformation: how dragons and fairies led the way to yoga, coaching and lifelong learning

As some of you may know, I recently completed a 200hour yoga teacher training course. I enjoyed it so much I signed up almost immediately to the more advanced 300hour course. One may wonder why when I already have a full-time job teaching and supporting academics and undergraduates; a young family; a school governor role and the embryonic start of a PhD to keep me busy!

I was set an assignment recently on the topic of self-transformation. It provides an answer of sorts to the question above and it links together some of the areas I am passionate about - coaching, lifelong learning and yoga - which is why I thought it would be appropriate to share it here. Transformation is a fluid, rather than a linear process and the 'final' state is very much a moving picture. It's quite personal so please be kind...

2020: Reflections and the year ahead

I wasn't sure whether to write a reflection post this year. I feel grateful that I've got through 2020 and I know that, despite many challenges, I am one of the lucky ones - I still have my job, my children and no-one I know has died from Covid. But I know that many aren't so fortunate - they have lost jobs, homes and loved ones. I don't want to add to comparison-itis, something I mentioned in last year's reflection post.

I teach others about the importance of reflection so I have decided to go ahead: writing my thoughts helps me to process them and it is often enlightening to go back several months or even years later.

I started 2020 with a determined sense of purpose. Having gone through a tough few years, I was ready to get back into writing, presenting, and expanding my travelling experiences. In preparation, I renewed the family passports in January and earmarked Eurostar tickets - isn't hindsight a wonderful thing?! I also wanted to increase my work from home time. I did gain this at least in 2020 but I wasn't banking on two small children being with me for the majority of it!

Tentatively stepping into outside coaching

I want to tell you about my experience of outdoors coaching.

It may come as no surprise that I enjoy being indoors. Being curled up with a good book, wrapped in a blanket, a steaming hot chocolate next to me and the sound of rain lashing against the window pane is my idea of bliss (sadly since having young children this happens much less than I would like, apart from the rain bit as I do live in the UK!).

However, I have also always enjoyed the outdoors. I'm not a climber or hiker but have enjoyed many windswept walks across sea fronts; meanders around Penistone crags (invoking my inner Cathy); and cycle rides around parks filled with deer. 

When I was a child I used to collect acorns. I would fill the tops with water to make fairy cups and mush the remainder to make squirrel food or 'potions'. I've grown vegetables as long as I remember - some years I have even been successful. I take my yoga practice outside when the weather permits and I spend most weekends walking the children through the woods in the hope that the stillness rubs off on them.

I have long been aware of the benefits of being outdoors and I recently had the opportunity to find out how I could combine this with my coaching. I have previously held meetings and coaching sessions outdoors on campus before but it has been an afterthought - the weather was particularly nice or I was unable to find a suitable room. I decided to find out how I could coach outdoors with intention. 

I'd been trying to attend Claire Bradshaw's Outdoor Coaching programme for several years but couldn't logistically make it happen. An unexpected benefit of the pandemic has meant that I could finally attend - albeit virtually. 

Over the three week course, I was able to reflect on the different types of outdoor space and the physical, emotional and cognitive effects it may have on both myself and those I coach. I considered the impact of coaching while being apart - over the phone or via online meetings. I discovered how the environment plays an active, rather than a passive role. Importantly, I learned about the extra requirements needed when contracting and thinking about the practicalities - we don't want to be shivering with cold or worried about falling when we should be focussed on listening and thinking!

While the course did open my eyes to just how much extra work and consideration goes into coaching outdoors, it has whetted my appetite to keep learning more about it and include it in my toolbox of skills. Since then I have attended a Street Wisdom event which I may blog about next. I have also presented my experiences to the coaching community within my workplace. With social distancing making being in a close space far from ideal, this outdoors coaching may just have legs*.

Would you consider being coached or having meetings outside? Perhaps it's something you do already? If so, what was it like?

*I'm so sorry I couldn't help myself!

When stationery becomes a sign of optimism and hope

Have you bought a diary for the upcoming academic year? I've seen on social media people saying they aren't going to bother. Mine arrived last week. 

When you work in education it can feel like you get chance to start fresh twice, not only in January but also in September. I prefer the September one - it comes with snuggly jumpers, crisp walks and without the barrage of 'sort your life out this second' adverts.

September brings with it a new academic year with its fresh Term 1. This often goes hand in hand with a new diary, perhaps a new set of pens too. For the last few years I have used the bullet journal system and moved from Hemingway’s favourite, the Moleskine, to Leuchtturm for the dots, colours and slightly wider pages. This year I am trying out the Ottergamis dotted notebook. It’s thicker, has templates (not a deal-breaker) and has a cute otter logo on the front (this possibly is a deal breaker). It is a thing of beauty and has gorgeously thick paper. Unfortunately, I’ve just found out it doesn’t have page numbers.

Anyhow, perhaps I am being naively unrealistic in buying a new diary for the 20/21 academic year when the 19/21 still has quite a few empty pages. I’m not quite sure why they are so empty when I was actually busier than before. I didn’t think that was possible. This whole ‘going back to work’ business sounds ridiculous (and insulting) when I, and many like me have been working doubly hard to support our students while home-schooling at the same time - and feeling like we’re doing neither well enough. 

Perhaps it feels safe to carry on with same routines of buying stationery to see in the new academic year. There’s safety in traditions. This year it feels brave and optimistic to say I will carry on - despite everything this year has thrown up regarding work, relationships and health. For now, I am in the fortunate position of being in a new job with a number of opportunities in front of me. 

This year was going to be the year I found myself after having my two children. I arranged passports so we could travel. I seriously considered world schooling when my job prospects didn’t look promising. I was determined. I was going to coach, do yoga etc. Then the pandemic hit. I got sick. I obviously don’t know if it was the dreaded COVID but it was incredibly frightening. Luckily, I recovered and found that while it was incredibly stressful trying to work and look after two small children there were numerous positives; e.g. not being stuck on the motorway worried I was going to miss the after-school childcare pickup. 

Now we have to return. I’m trying to phase it in slowly as my children don’t like changes in routines. Despite still waking up at 5 or 6 every morning, I know I’m going to miss mornings not being too stressful and having all my meal-times with my children. I’m concerned about them getting ill and, besides the obvious worry about their health, the impact this has on everything else. 

One thing I am looking forward to though is being able to hear myself think!  

What is going to be different for you in the next few months? What are you doing to prepare for it? Feel free to show me your new stationery pictures!

Taking responsibility as an educator during Mental Health Awareness Week

It's Mental Health Awareness Week.

Staff and students within the Higher Education sector are facing pressure like they've never known it before. In timely fashion on Monday this week, Universities UK launched an updated version of StepChange - a framework for what mentally healthy universities look like. Mental health is something to be preserved all year round not just for once a week and I think it's a good step that underlying structures are now being considered.

Even though we aren't yet quite sure whether we have escaped relatively unscathed (I imagine not many of us have) we are already pondering what next term may look like and how we might support our staff and students in what has already become an overused term - the 'new normal'. I'm hoping it will be more personalised, more flexible and more inclusive.

Despite much being out of our control, there is still plenty within it. Therefore, we all have a responsibility for ourselves and for others in our care. It may not be perfect, far from it, but as Brené Brown says 'we are doing the best we can with the tools we have'.

Some of what I'm doing for others:

• I'm creating workshop material that I hope is sympathetic to people's circumstances; e.g. they don't have to worry about when to feed their children as my workshops aren't live and therefore don't clash
• I've extended all deadlines where possible
• I'm providing free mindfulness workshops and recordings
• I'm offering free coaching to work colleagues

My local woods which I can't currently visit. 

They are the inspiration for one of my mindfulness exercises.

Some of what I'm doing for myself:

• Switching off at weekends and spending time with my kids in the garden
• Recognising when I'm getting frustrated at people's emails and stepping away till I'm calmer
• Being kind to myself - there's only so much I can do in my circumstances
• Allocating time for my yoga teacher training. I'm enjoying seeing the links between this and my coaching and teaching practices.

What about you? How are you acknowledging your own mental health and that of your colleagues and students?

Working from home while looking after our children and our well-being

This is a post for all the academic and librarian parents who are currently working from home, home-schooling the kids and keeping the house from becoming dangerous and unsanitary, while doing their best to look after their own mental health.

I keep receiving marketing emails asking me what I'm doing with all my free time?!

I suspect their target audience aren't working from home, home-schooling, and looking after a toddler and cat - the latter who still hasn't got the memo that 5.30am is not a good time to miaow for breakfast!

Naughty Loki!

So what are you doing to stay sane while you try not to be bitter about those who complain to be bored? Such little imagination! Personally, I would be reading all the things, baking all the things, becoming fluent in French, fixing up my garden and planning my adventures for when Covid-19 (also known as 'all this stuff') is no longer a massively disrupting force in our lives.

Instead, this week I am mainly holding back-to-back formative assessments via Skype, while my 5 year old argues that he is the teacher and will take the register (he's already told me the passcode for the school's reception!).

So here are a few tips on keeping your cool:

Go easy on yourself and everybody 

Your kids will be anxious, as will your students and yourself. It's an unusual time with lots of uncertainty. Do what you can to maintain some normalcy. Reassure them. With regards to teaching, it can take a lot of time and skill to develop fantastic online courses so be kind to yourself and just focus on the essential learning outcomes. The bells and whistles can be added a bit later. Can the activity be changed? Does it really have to be synchronous?

Let it go

Yes, there are selfish people stockpiling formula and toilet rolls. Yes, there will be people emailing you to say they are frustrated as they've had to deal with changed assessments and are worried about loved ones while you want to say, erm, hello. But - we don't have control over other's actions and feelings, only our own. At some point, unless we can do something directly about it, it's best to focus on the good that people are doing.

Find a routine that works for you

For me, I am chunking appointments and everything else is working on the premise of little and often. I'm currently: writing a chapter, an article, changing the way I teach and providing support for people on the courses I run. By fitting something from all of these into my calendar, even if I only manage a small fraction, I am still moving forwards on everything. Others may find that doing a day on and a day off works better, perhaps alternating with a partner if one is available. There are many factors to take into consideration, from the age of your kids to who has wi-fi priority, so it may take a while to find a rhythm.

Get some fresh air/exercise (ideally both) if you can

For some this will be easier than others. I'm lucky that I have a garden, although it's in a sorry state, so I can hang my washing out, plant some seeds and blow bubbles with the children and we can all blow off some steam. Social distancing can still involve a run or a walk outside as long as we stay away from people and wash our hands thoroughly, although I haven't done this yet. Additionally, there are plenty of free yoga, HIIT and other exercise videos freely available on YouTube. I like Yoga with Adrienne and The Body Coach (in small doses) and the kids like Cosmic Kids and Jump Start Jonny.

Use all media mindfully

Like many others, I was avidly listening to the radio, watching the news and following social media for updates. I felt myself getting tense, scared and crying occasionally. This week has been so busy with the kids and the assessments that I've barely had time to look. Social media has long since been my way of keeping in touch since I had children so I won't be logging off; however, a little recalibration is very useful to ensure we spend time looking at what is helpful to us or where we can be of use to others. 

Ultimately, this is going to be our new normal for a while. The easier we can make it for ourselves  and those around us the better it will be.

What's your approach? What are you doing to look after yourself?

My Senior Fellowship experience

I have been awarded Senior Fellow status of Advance HE. While I started writing and thinking about Senior Fellowship just over a year ago, my Senior Fellowship experience began, although unknowingly at the time, at the Aurora programme I attended in 2016. At Aurora I defined my values, my strengths and my skills. This in turn led me to changing roles from an Academic Librarian to a Lecturer in Higher Education. This move allowed me to be less constrained by budget limitations and make more of an impact on teaching and learning development. In my interview for the role, I was asked to present my approach to helping staff develop their practices and it was here I first chose to define my coaching approach. It was this coaching approach I developed into my Senior Fellow application.

My reasons for applying

Primarily, it was a pre-requisite of my probation in my new role. however, having previously completed my Fellowship application in 2015 I was aware of the value of the process. This value is what I reiterate to those who have also been told they must achieve it - yes, there are boxes to be ticked, but the space and time to reflect and discover can, unfortunately, be a rare thing. This process provides that space and time.

My process

I started by looking at the criteria and considering my case studies. I had been on maternity leave just prior to writing it so was acutely aware that some of my experience may seem out of date. As part of my role at the University, I sit on panels where people who apply for Senior Fellowship are routinely referred as they don't fit specific criteria. This meant I was able to pick up tips, which helped. I  advise, coach and train others to achieve accreditation; however, taking your own advice, as so often in life, can be challenging. I also had a different format to follow as I applied directly to Advance HE to avoid any ethical conflicts. Advance HE currently requires two case studies, one reflective account, and two references which may be different to those who go through their University's accreditation schemes. 

While I had a loose plan, I actually took a different approach to usual and used Julia Cameron's morning pages method of just writing and writing, and writing some more without worrying about making sense - to the point that when I looked again at the word count I was shocked to discover I had double the total wordcount! I'm not sure I'd recommend this approach. While I found it to be quite cathartic, I really did feel like I was then killing my darlings as I omitted whole sections when editing.


Drafts, drafts, drafts - don't necessarily mean perfection

So many drafts to the point I was fed up of it and wanted to hand the whole thing in. I would strongly recommend getting other people's eyes on it; however, I'd advise not having too many. I received conflicting advice and at one point began to question my own judgment which added to the challenges. Ultimately, I am grateful for the people who took time out of their routines to read and offer their opinions and I gained from each of the interactions. My final draft was given to one of my references who told me that, yes, while small tweaks could be made, it was suitable for submission. My old self would have jumped on that comment and 'corrected' those areas; however, done is better than perfect, so I sent it in.

Waiting to hear

I knew it would be a long time to hear back, so I had almost forgotten about it until a fellow Auroran announced she'd received hers. I was hoping I had passed as I don't like revisiting and redrafting something once I have emotionally and psychologically said goodbye to it. I was relieved indeed to receive an email soon after which announced I could now use the SFHEA post nominals.

Going forwards

I continue to keep my teaching notebook for jotting down a few thoughts after my classes. I continue to be interested in how using a coaching approach in higher education can improve both practice and wellbeing simultaneously. I will shortly be speaking at both the Accredited Programme Leader's Network and the Advance HE learning and Teaching Conference on various aspects of this topic. I also have a few writing projects in the pipeline. Paying it forwards, I would be absolutely delighted to help, coach or mentor anyone whose goal it is to achieve FHEA or SFHEA accreditation.

And, just for my mum, - my full post-nominals are BA (Hons), MA (Lond) MCLIP SFHEA.

Being organised when there are multiple demands on your time

I recently wrote a blog post on tools I use to keep organised. It was one of my most popular posts so, keeping with a theme, I thought I’d share with you how I make the most of time. Take from it what you find useful and ignore the rest.

I’ve read we all have the same 24 hours as Beyoncé. That, of course, is true but most of us tend to live very different lifestyles and time can feel very different when there are numerous demands on it.

I also think many tips on productivity seem to be written by (and for) people who are able to get a full night’s rest whenever they choose, have a cleaner or family on hand to help out, or just don’t have young, gorgeous but quite sticky mitts and faces to extricate from work clothes.

So, here’s some of the ways I make it work:

Consider what we’re saying yes to:

I was asked this question by a coach. What are you agreeing to and why? Do you want to be signed up for these things? For example, a lot of women who go on maternity leave end up taking up the slack when it comes to house-hold stuff because they are home. Their main role is supposed to be keeping the new baby alive and content and healing themselves. When they go back to work those tasks don’t seem to be divvied up again. This happened to me too, despite me being the one who works full-time. My only solution so far is to reduce what I have and only buy essential stuff. This makes cleaning and tidying easier.

One thing I have said yes to is walking across campus for meetings. I like to keep this even though it may seem inefficient. It gets me away from the computer and outside for my daily Vitamin D. It also reminds anyone who sees me that I still exist beyond email!

Consider what we’re saying no to:

By saying yes to some things, we are automatically saying no to others. By being conscious of the reasons we are saying no we can do so calmly and without guilt. I’ve been saying no to some things recently. Even though I’d like to do them, they don’t quite add enough value to be worth giving up other stuff I want to do. I know I just don’t have the capacity to take on ‘all the things’ and wouldn’t do the job well. It’s good to keep pushing at the edges (that’s where the interesting stuff happens) but not get to the point where we can’t cope.

Chunking (and protecting) time:

On very busy days I will schedule all my meetings back to back in a centrally located space. It’s halfway located between my office and theirs so shows compromise. If people are late they get less time. If they need more they will then need to make another appointment – currently I don’t have a limit on these but this may change in future. It means I don’t offer an extra well-meaning ten minutes for someone who’s very late. I also chunk marking, email and writing up observation forms.

Using liminalities of time: 

Conversely, there’s always time in between meetings. Time where people have failed to show up. Time in between appointments. I keep a book, a notepad and my phonecharger on me at all times so I can always make the most of those precious few minutes. I don’t start big tasks here or ones that require too much concentration, like marking, but I might start planning something which I can pick up later or answer a few emails. 

Being aware of and using energy wisely: 

Many productivity gurus will say get up at 5am. They'll say use this time to journal, meditate and go for a run. When you don’t know when the kids will wake up and have no-one to watch them while you go for a shower (never mind a run) this can be tricky. I’m generally up at 5.45am every morning (not out of choice) and still get woken up several times through the night (this isn’t as frequent as it used to be) so sleep is a BIG priority. I am also at my most creative and productive in the mornings. As a result, where possible I schedule my teaching, training, planning and writing for then. I aim to have my meetings in the afternoon. I never skip meals as I know this wrecks my energy levels. I can't do large bouts of exercise without being interrupted but can just about do ten minutes of yoga or HIIT with the children and cat climbing on me and joining in - this keeps my energy and sanity levels okay-ish.

Being present with my children

Evenings and weekends are for my children. They are young and need, nay, demand my attention! I’m happy to give it to them. While I still check my phone occasionally to avoid any nasty surprises come Monday morning, I rarely answer email then. This is the time when I take us all to the woods which I find benefits us all. When they’ve gone to sleep, I have about two hours to have dinner then choose to either blog, do my yoga course, plan my coaching business or read. Or just go to bed.

What are your tips and tricks? What are you saying yes and no to? Where are you using your energy? Leave a comment below. 

2019: Reflections and the year ahead

'You don't have to move fast or far. 

You can go just an inch. 

You can mark your progress breath by breath' 

Cheryl Strayed.

There seems to be a panic in the air, or at least over social media, about the upcoming decade. People are listing their achievements and challenges from the last ten years while others are complaining that it creates a fervour of comparison-itis. There are posts all over the place saying 'make this the decade that counts' or words to similar effect. It can be exhausting.

We all have our own personal challenges and areas we want to grow and flourish in.

It can be so difficult to not compare, especially when brought up in a culture of scarcity, and then berate ourselves for falling short.

Every December I post about the challenges and positives I have experienced in the previous year with some overarching aims for the next. This year is no different. My goals are not just short-term actions to do and tick off. Instead, they help me move towards the type of person I want to be - a healthier, happier, more present version of myself.

Writing these helps me reflect and I like having something to come back to later on down the line when I'm having a bad day/week/month and realise that while I may sometimes be moving slowly -  I am still moving! Having children can slow us down and this comes with both positives and negatives. I hope this helps you in some way too.

I've considered choosing a word like some do to guide my life. I like the idea but can't come to a decision - I am currently hovering between 'love' and 'flourish'. The former has been inspired by bell hook's book 'All about Love'. Another post on this will come later.

So on with my year:

Positives

Health: One of my aims was to spend more time away from my desk at lunchtime and increase my exercise. We had a gorgeous summer in the UK so this made it much easier. I ate lunches outside and I held lots of my coaching and meetings outdoors too. This had a positive impact on my mental health and helped others too. I reduced my alcohol intake to almost nothing (apart from an erroneous week in May) which increased my patience and clarity. I increased my exercise by doing HIIT and yoga most mornings. The HIIT increased my energy levels and while I found it too much to do every morning (trying to exercise with two small children and a cat is challenging!) I now have a regular-ish routine.

Home: A goal I had last year was to visit more places with my children before my eldest went to primary school. This was successful - I took them to Cardigan Bay in Wales, Legoland, Corfe Castle, Brownsea Island, various National Trust beaches, Whipsnade, Stonehenge, Avebury, and numerous parks and woods around the country. The kids and I had a lovely time together and this is something I will continue doing at the weekends and holidays. I also had most of my fences fixed (and sold stuff to pay for it so a decluttering win too) which means the kids can play outside more.

Work: I completed my coaching qualification and learned a lot about myself in the process. I submitted my Advance HE Senior Fellowship. I survived a restructure and took on a lot of new responsibilities for which I've received amazing feedback about. I was also headhunted for a really interesting job. A TIP: Always keep your CV up to date!

Challenges

Work: See above! A restructure and losing valuable members of our team was difficult and they are missed. I wasn't successful with the position I was headhunted for; however, it has opened up my eyes to my own value and the possibilities available. It gave me the opportunity to question and confirm my priorities and values so I am grateful.

Health/Home: There have been appointments, pain, operations and hospital stays for the majority of my family this year, myself included. It has led to much upset. Ultimately, we can only have so much influence and control. I use a technique with my students using the Circle of Concern and the Sphere of Influence - I have found it valuable myself in these situations.

Aims for 2020

• Keep being present and do interesting activities/trips with my children
• Complete the Yoga Teacher Training I have recently started. I'm looking forward to this as it is the perfect format for someone who works full-time and has two young children to support. I'll be looking for people to practice on...
• Maintain my coaching and mentoring - I intend to become accredited in the future so will be building up my hours. Let me know if you'd like to help me with this.
• Maintain my Mindfulness workshops - I will start to align these with my yoga course as it progresses
• Get out more - in work and home. I haven't been attending or speaking at events for a couple of years and I'm now ready to start doing this again.

How did you develop last year? What do you plan to do in 2020? Feel free to reply in the comments, especially if you can help me in my aims or I can help you in yours!

Which Advance HE accreditation is right for you?

"Fellowship provides individuals with recognition of their practice, impact and leadership of teaching and learning, against the descriptors of the Professional Standards Framework (PSF)." (Advance HE 2019)

Advance HE Fellowship descriptors/categories are not hierarchical! A statement I make in every single workshop and conversation I have after someone states they are going to work their way up the levels.

You would be forgiven for thinking they are: the terminology would suggest it - Associate, Fellow, Senior and Principal.

Associate Fellow (AFHEA) is for you if:
Teaching and/or supporting learners is a part of your job but not the main focus. For example, you may be an information professional or a Graduate Teaching Assistant who doesn't design or assess learners but may support them on an enquiry desk or in a lab alongside a lecturer.

Fellowship (FHEA) is for you if:
You can show evidence of designing, assessing and teaching learners. You will probably spend a significant proportion of your time teaching. You will be interested in developing professionally, reflecting on your practice and, if you're newly employed at a University, successful completion may be part of your probationary requirements.

Senior Fellowship is for you if:
You have a thorough knowledge of effective practices and a sustained record of supporting others to improve their teaching and learning activities. Perhaps you mentor academics. Maybe you provide programmes of support to lecturers so they can improve their information literacy to the benefit of their students.

Principal Fellow (PFHEA) is for you if :

You work in a strategic leadership role and can show a sustained record of effectiveness of academic practice and development. Perhaps you are a Director of an Academic Practice department or a Vice Provost for Education.

Not hierarchical - RawPixels.com

The confusion arises because the categories are aligned to people's roles and these roles often change and develop over time. As new academics become firmly established they are sometimes given the responsibilities of mentoring others or supporting their colleagues; for example, with course design. You may be a Reader or Professor and have little to do supporting others so an Associate or Fellow category would be more suitable. Alternatively, you may be a newly employed educational developer whose sole role is to do this.

Have you decided yet? Now that Term 1 is coming closer to an end perhaps it's something you wish to consider for 2020. Let me know your thoughts in the comments.

Related posts:

Using the GROW coaching model to help someone reach SFHEA status
FHEA progress to date: Reflective Assessment Portfolio

What's a teaching philosophy, and why does it matter?

Why do you teach the way you do? How do your personal and professional values align with what's going on in your teaching practice? How can you tell?

Teaching philosophies are commonplace in primary and secondary education and are becoming more so in higher education. I've even started to hear about them being used as part of the job interview process.

Participants on the postgraduate certificate course, graduate teaching assistant course and for those applying for a Fellowship of Advance HE via the open route at my institution are required to write one.

@omgitsyeshi - Unsplash.com

Why write one?

• It helps us to make decisions about our behaviour, the tools and activities we use and the way we interact with those we teach
• It helps us be consistent in those decisions and choices
• Being self-aware and being able to articulate our reasons provides us with confidence
• Confidence will provide authority 
• Cognitive dissonance and the resulting burnout will reduce as what we believe and what we do will be in alignment
• It will help us make career choices - are our values and philosophies supported or hindered by our environment, colleagues and institution

What goes in a teaching philosophy?

Ask yourself questions such as:

• What do I mean by teaching?
• What do I mean by learning?
• What drives me and keeps me motivated?
• What are my personal and professional values?
• how do they show up in my practice?
• What actually happens in my classroom?

My own teaching philosophy is centred around my belief that everyone should have the opportunity to develop their potential and that if people could improve what they do, even if just by 10%, then this would improve the world we live in. I create space for the honing of skills such as critical thinking, independent learning and teamwork. This space helps to form connections; connections between ideas and social connections between peers. I give my time to students: I am prepared and enthusiastic; I am the first one in the door welcoming my students and the last one out saying goodbye. My materials and activities are carefully thought out and planned. This shows I take myself and my students seriously and value their precious time. 

What does yours look like? I'd love to know so feel free to leave a comment.

Writing an educational autobiography

How did your experiences as a learner define the way you now teach?

We all remember the really good and the bad teachers at school but we don’t often stop and think about the impact it made. As people now responsible for creating those memories, it can be helpful to step back and consider this carefully.

The participants on the Postgraduate Certificate in Academic Practice course are required to do just this. It takes the form of a 500 word educational autobiography outlining one or two experiences of being a learner which has shaped their practice.

Some questions to ask yourself when writing one: 

• What happened? Describe the event.
• How did this make you feel at the time? 
• How did it help or hinder your learning? 
• What aspect of this is reflected in the way you now teach? 

Mapping the educational journey - Pexels.com

For example, I had a physics teacher for five years at school. Most of the lessons were spent copying verbatim out of a textbook. It was incredibly dull. As I left school for the last time, I said goodbye to him. He didn't recognise me and didn’t know my name. I can empathise to some extent as I'm not great at remembering names but after five years of seeing this person weekly, c'mon! It made me feel the subject was pointless. I couldn’t see any relevance to it and I remember nothing of value from that time. It also made me feel insignificant.

This contrasts massively with an English teacher I had who was passionate, engaged and who encouraged us to discuss and debate in class. In her class it was safe to voice an opinion. She was interested in what everyone had to say. I felt she was the one person in my life who understood my love of reading. It’s no surprise I went on to read English at university.

As a result, in my own teaching and coaching, I do my best to connect with the people in the room. I am always there first, well-prepared and I welcome them as they enter the room. I encourage conversation and the sharing of experiences and stories. I create a safe environment and set ground rules of respectful enquiry so everyone can feel seen and heard. I encourage participants to make notes using their own words and take pictures of their creations from the activities they participate in.

Have you done this exercise before? What experiences did you have as a learner that shaped where you are today and the behaviour you exhibit? How would you like your teaching to be remembered?