What I learned from training to be a Performance Coach in Higher Education

What have you learned recently, either professionally or personally? Have you found there has been an overlap between the two?

This year I trained and qualified to be a performance coach with the Institute of Leadership and Management. This is something I’ve wanted for myself for a while now so I was thrilled to finally receive my certificate. I learned a lot during the course. I increased my knowledge of the skills, behaviours and techniques required to become an ethical, non-judgemental coach who could successfully support someone else in the achievement of their goals. I also learned a lot about myself. I’ve picked out a few things below which might resonate with you too:

I can be determined when it matters:

When something enters my life that I am passionate about, it is all consuming. My determination to succeed at this meant I was motivated and organised. This was on top of starting a new job and still waking up through the night to feed my youngest. I took on board feedback, kept my learning logs and diaries up to date as I went along and met all my deadlines. I made it work by incorporating it into every aspect of my life. I practised my coaching skills in almost every conversation I could, even with my kids. Especially with my kids.

I experience the same highs and lows as everyone else

I went from 'the peak of inflated expectations' to 'the trough of disillusionment' about a third way into the course. Prior to taking the course, I’d read books, journal articles, watched videos and attended workshops. I had thought I knew a lot about coaching. It turns out, unsurprisingly, that sustained practise is completely different and much more intense than I'd realised. I seriously started to doubt that I could do it in the way I had envisaged. I had wanted this for a long time and it felt really miserable that I might not actually be any good at it. I have been aware of the Gartner Hype Cycle for years now so going back to it helped me realise I would get there soon enough and this is something I sometimes share with my students and clients to help motivate them.

Gartner Hype Cycle

Connections are important and take effort

During the coaching, I worried that I couldn’t connect with people. This was a concern because it is a crucial element of forming a coaching relationship. I’ve always preferred to read rather than socialise. There were difficulties with having friends when I was younger. Then circumstances in my marriage also meant maintaining friendships was challenging. On the other hand, I’ve always had jobs where I listen to people and provide them with what they need, or at least the skills to find it for themselves. People will stop me in the street to talk to me. They tell me I am calming and make them feel better, listened to and motivated. Reading my testimonials has given me confidence in this area and I'm aware that there's nothing like being given undivided attention to make people feel special.

Self-consciousness is not self-awareness

As I progressed through the course, my self-consciousness gave way to self-awareness. I could knowingly use various skills, models and techniques in the appropriate context and enable that ‘aha’ moment to occur. I learned that environment is incredibly important - one of my clients became visibly uncomfortable when we had to use a lecture room - which to her was associated with stress and pressure. I won’t make that mistake again. I now try to go outside whenever possible though of course, in Britain, that has its own challenges. I have had people telling me I am good and recommending me. My supervisor told me I could look harsh when closed but when open I had a rapport that he wished he could bottle. I'm becoming aware of when I have unreasonable expectations of others and at the same time I am learning to put boundaries in place.

A coaching culture benefits everybody in an organisation, not just management

Everyone in my organisation is technically entitled to access a coach. This is amazing. Yet it isn't taken up in the quantities you would expect, perhaps because it is perceived as something for management or for remedial action. Yet, you don’t have to be a qualified coach to use the skills with other people. Supervisors can ask open questions to doctoral researchers to help them understand their topic more. Tutors can paraphrase and summarise a student’s comment to ensure they have understood it correctly and increase confidence. Managers can help their staff work towards purposeful and realistic goals. And everybody would benefit from improving their non-judgemental listening skills.

I have gained a lot both personally and professionally from becoming qualified as a Performance Coach and I would like to thank Bernie Croft of Brunel of Brunel University London and Don Greenwood of Metice Development Solutions for accepting me on the course.

What have you been learning recently and what impact has this made on you? Have you signed up for something that will be starting shortly? I'd be delighted if you shared your experiences in the comments